


Three of Swords

by Marshmalloween



Category: Political Animals
Genre: Angst, Childhood Friends, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Male-Female Friendship, Unrequited Love, possible friends to lover
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-10
Updated: 2020-08-10
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:34:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25826755
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marshmalloween/pseuds/Marshmalloween
Summary: You are TJ’s childhood friend that has a crush on him since you are a kid. You’re heartbroken when you heard the news of his a attempt on suicide and you try to help him take back the pieces.
Relationships: Thomas "T. J." Hammond&Reader, Thomas "T. J." Hammond/Female Character(s), Thomas "T. J." Hammond/Reader
Kudos: 4





	Three of Swords

**Author's Note:**

> This is for HBC Drunk Drabble @the-ss-horniest-book-club prompt/request that I ask because I wanted to explore other Seb character. I am still new to this character and have not watched any of the episodes. Thank you to all the HBC ladies for giving me background input on TJ character, and @jobean12-blog for beta' it for me. Comment and kudos are really appreciated. Let me know what you think about this :)

A vibration on the table shifted your focus to the movie in front of you and the iPad on your lap. You swiped up the screen and looked at who was texting you at this time. A text with the name TJ made you immediately open it. 

**_T.J: Einstein, are you up?_ **

**_Y/N: How many times have I told you not to call me Einstein? 😒_ _  
_ **

****

**_T.J: 😏_ **

**_T.J: Tell me, ok?_ **

****

**_Y/N: Are you ok? Have you been out of the hospital yet?_ **

****

**_T.J: yeah…_ **

**_T.J: I am bored_ **

****

**_TJ don’t tell me— where are you?_ **

A sudden knock on your apartment door startled you. You quickly leave your comfy chaise and run to the front door. You try to see who’s knocking at your door but find no one. 

Hmm, strange, you thought. As you turned around to go back to your warm chaise, another knock can be heard from outside. Without missing a beat, you open the door and look to the right. TJ was standing in front of your apartment door wearing a leather jacket and jeans. 

“I thought you were still in the hospital?” You ask him dumbfounded.

TJ just walked right passed you, strutted into your apartment and living room. Even though you only saw his face in a flash, you knew that he’s not a hundred percent well.

“You don’t want me here?” 

“What? No—“ you frowned. You pinched the bridge of your nose, realizing you’re saying the wrong words. “It’s not that. You are welcome here. You know that, right?” You closed the door behind you and followed TJ to the living room. 

He sat next to the chaise, facing the TV that’s been playing pride and prejudice. You stood in front of him, body blocking his vision. 

“TJ—“ your voice sounds softer but demands his attention. 

TJ looks upon you. His eyes were reddish color and puffy. Face a little bit paler than the last time you saw him in the hospital.

TJ hugged your hip. His head was resting at the lower part of your abdomen. You were surprised by his actions and confused about how to respond. Although you hesitated for a moment, you draped your hands around the back of his neck, albeit awkwardly. 

You massage TJ’s nape slowly, making him shudder. ”This must be a foolish question, but are you ok?” 

TJ didn’t respond to you immediately. He clutched at the back of your sweater, hugging you a little bit tighter. Your heart flutters at the action. You knew he never saw you as more than a childhood friend, but a small part in your heart wished he did.

“I am trying, Einstein.” He sighed, voice heavy with despair.

You scoffed at him. “TJ, how many times should I tell you to stop calling me that?” Your fingers now crawled up to his hair, weaving between the silky locks. It’s not every day you can put your hands on his hair, so you just savored the moment right now. 

”Einstein—“

”Hmm?”

”I am hungry.” 

You cackle instantly at that. Reluctantly, you released your hand from his hair and made him look up at

you. “You always visit me when I am making good food, don’t you?” You joke. You pat him on his shoulder and ask him to follow you to the kitchen. 

TJ sat on one of the counter stools you have. You put a glass of warm water in front of him while you reheat your soup. You also boiled water in a kettle to make some tea for yourself. 

TJ was watching your every movement. His blue-grey eyes intrigued at the domesticity in front of him. A scene that he hasn’t seen for a long time in his house, or from people he surrounded himself with. “You know, I envisioned you as a good mother in the future.”

You look at him like a deer caught in the headlights. You aren’t sure how to react to this wisdom that came out of TJ’s mouth. 

“I hope I didn’t say anything wrong.” TJ’s says quickly

after he saw your facial expression. He wasn’t sure if it’s horror, surprise, or you just being caught off guard. 

“No-No, it’s alright. It’s just that I never thought you would say something like that. Not like you at all.” You smile at him.

TJ’s arched his brows in amusement. “Like me? Tell me, Einstein, you are the smarter one here.”

You bite your lower lip and hold your protest for that nickname. You didn’t like it when he calls you that, but it’s the closest thing to a pet name from him to you. 

“Well, for starters, you always talk about fashion.” You go back to the soup you’re reheating and put it in a bowl. 

“About a party here and there.” You put the bowl on the marble countertop in front of him. 

“And every handsome stranger you have encountered there.” You finally join him and sit on the nearby stool

with your warm chamomile tea. 

Your heart clenched every time you remember his talks about all those men and how you were especially against his relationship with Sean. 

“Wow—I, I made quite an impression, didn’t I?” 

You pat his right shoulder. “Eat the soup. It will get cold soon.” 

***

You knew immediately that TJ would spend the night. It’s not normal for him, but he usually stays the night if he visited you this late. 

You let him finish the food while you make another concoction. You poor the hot beverage into two small cups and let it sit on the marble countertop. You chuckle as you watch TJ’s eyeing it curiously. 

You left him yo grab a thick blanket from your closet. You put two fluffy pillows and the blanket on the lounge sofa in the living room. Your taupe sofa looks comfortable, and a lot of people love it for its deep and soft comfort. And you know that’s what he needs the most. 

You can sense TJ’s eyes bore into the back of your head, and you turn to look at him. “What?”

“Nothing.” He said quickly. 

You let your question slide. You walk back to the kitchen area and put the empty bowl in the sink. You were satisfied when there are no leftovers in the bowl. You handed TJ the hot concoction from earlier and sit next to him. The beverage is more lukewarm than before and perfect to sip. 

“What’s this?” 

“It’s golden milk TJ. Try it, it’s good.” 

TJ tries to sip it carefully. The surprised look on his face makes you chuckle. 

“It’s good, right?” 

TJ just nods and continues to drink it. You may as well drink yours. 

Both you and TJ drink the milk in silence. You don’t really know what to talk about, and he probably doesn’t want to hear your thoughts on his latest issues. 

As TJ finishes drinking the milk, he glances at you every once in a while. His forehead creased and eyes full of concentration. “Thank you for letting me in.” He said.

The half-smile he gave you made your heart ache. You wish he didn’t fall for that man. “You know you are always welcome here.” You give him a warm smile and hold his right hand to comfort him, and maybe yourself too. 

After TJ’s insists on helping you put all the dishes inside the dishwasher, you bid him a good night. Telling him that the makeshift bed in the living room was ready, and a new toothbrush can be found under the right corner of the cabinet in the bathroom. 

Before you enter your bedroom, you turn off the TV and pick up your iPad. You close your barn doors, yes you have a barn door for your bedroom, and turn off your lamp. You open your curtains as the night sky looks clear, and the landscape from your window looks peaceful. You set your alarm to wake up early as you planned before TJ’s abrupt visit tonight. 

You covered yourself with a comforter and rest your head in the comfort of your fluffy pillows. Not long after that, you can feel your muscles relax as the night pulls you into its embrace. 

It’s probably an hour after that you hear the sound of your barn door shifting open. You are awakened by the sound, although you already knew who the culprit was.

TJ closed the door behind him, trying to be as quiet as possible. He knew he failed miserably when he saw you in a sitting position on the bed, hair in disarray, and face a little confused.

**“I can’t sleep. Can I stay here?”** He gave you that worried, confused face and who are you to say no to him. He is gonna be the death of me, you thought. You get out of bed and walk to your closet. You rummage through your closet and pull out some fabric.

”change into this if you want to sleep in my comfy bed TJ. Jeans and a dirty shirt aren’t allowed.” you joke half sleepily. 

He collected the T-shirt and sweatpants you gave him and changed in front of you. Your mouth gaped, and you cursed internally. Your sleepy moment was gone as you glance up to the ceiling and clear your throat. “Can you do this in the bathroom or somewhere else?” 

TJ lets out a small chuckle but keeps changing. He threw his T-shirt at the hamper near the bedroom door and followed by getting rid of his jeans. “It’s not like you have never seen a naked man before, right?” 

You sighed and went back to the comfort of your bed. TJ quickly exited your bedroom and came back with the two pillows you lent him in the living room. He put the pillow on the right side of the bed and got under the cover. He shifted slightly, so he was practically next to you. “Can I snuggle a bit closer?” He asked, hesitantly. 

You looked to your left and nodded at him. TJ put his large left arm on your hip and rested his head at the crooked of your neck. You pat him slightly and try to go back to sleep.

“So who’s clothes I’m wearing right now? Is it your ex? Is he a handsome one?” 

You answered him quickly with closed eyes. “TJ, I need my beauty rest, ok. And by the look of your face, you need it as much as I do.” 

“Yeah, you are right. Good night Einstein.” 

You mumble a good night to him, but it sounds more like a muffle hmmm mmm.

***

The sound of a door opening to your balcony didn’t startle you. You know who’s trying to find you. 

”Einstein, what are you doing out here. Let’s go back inside, it’s cold.”

Without turning to face the source of the voice, you answer him quickly. ”I’m looking at the constellations right now. You can go back to sleep TJ. I didn’t mean to wake you up.” 

A grunt from TJ indicates he is displeased. He doesn’t go back inside the apartment like you asked him, instead he sits next to you on the balcony. 

You have a waterproof outdoor mattress that you situated on your balcony. You have spent so much time stargazing with your standing telescope while relaxing on the mattress. 

TJ suddenly wraps your body and himself in the comforter he left on the living room sofa last night. He rests his head in the crook of your neck. His action made your heart rate accelerate. It’s hard for you to concentrate on looking to the sky while he’s practically holding onto you like a koala on eucalyptus. 

”I thought you were gonna go inside because it’s cold. Thanks for the comforter, privileged boy.” you tease him to try to alleviate the mood and lower your heartbeat. 

”hmmm— mmm.” 

”So—, ” he said ”what constellation do you see this goodam early? Uh oh it’s not morning anyway it’s still dawn.” 

”it’s almost sunrise TJ.” you chuckled. ”and I have seen Mars this morning, very beautiful indeed. And Scorpius and Antares.” 

TJ perks at the names of those things. ”can I see it?”

”of course.” you shift slightly to the right to give TJroom to see the constellations through the telescope. 

”where is the Anters again?”

”Antares.” you correct him.

”yeah yeah, that one.” 

”it’s the reddish one and looks like Mars. But since it’s a star, it’s has a different light compared to the planet.”

TJ hummed while still continuing to look beyond the telescope. Your daydreaming was interrupted by TJ’s sudden question.

”Are you also disappointed in me?”

”TJ, what is this about?” 

He removed his eyes from the telescope and turned his body to face you. ”the news.” he gulped. ”the suicide attempt.” his eyelids dropped and glanced away from you. 

”Oh, TJ.,” you hugged him. ”No— I am not disappointed in you, ok.” your voice sounds like a quivering mess. “I am mad at you. I am mad that you would sacrifice your life for someone like him.” you were fighting back tears. ”he isn’t worth it.” 

TJ hugged you tight. ”I am sorry that I disappointed everyone. I am sorry that I made you mad at me.” you can feel extreme sadness from TJ for causing a lot of trouble. You calm him and hold him in that quiet morning. 

When both of you loosen from each other’s embrace, you put both of your palms on TJ’s cheeks. ”TJ, please don’t do something stupid like that again ok? We need to let go of a relationship that is no good for us. We need to move on.”

”I— I’ll try.” 

”look at me.” you demand.

His blue-grey eyes shone with unshed tears.

”Promise me!” 

”I promise.”

***

**Author's Note:**

> I am on tumblr as @chuuulip


End file.
